Supporting Your Partner with Anxiety

Living with anxiety can be overwhelming, not just for the person experiencing it, but also for their loved ones. If your partner struggles with anxiety, you may find yourself wanting to help but unsure of the best way to provide support. 

Being there for your partner in a compassionate way can make a significant difference in their mental wellness, and even in your relationship, but what’s the best way to support them?

That’s just the question our team at Brooklyn Integrative Psychological Services tackles below. Read on to learn some of the best ways to support your loved one.

Learn about your partner’s specific type of anxiety disorder 

Anxiety disorders affect 40 million American adults, which makes them the most common mental health disorder in America. Even though anxiety disorders are so common, there’s still plenty to learn about them. 

Understanding what anxiety is, how it manifests, and what triggers it can help you empathize with your partner’s experience. Anxiety isn’t just about feeling nervous; it can involve a range of symptoms, including physical sensations (like a racing heart), intrusive thoughts, and avoidance behaviors. 

To help understand what your partner is going through — and to cut through the myths — learn as much as you can about anxiety, including what type of anxiety disorder your partner has.

Anxiety disorders include:

• Generalized anxiety disorder
• Postpartum anxiety
• Social anxiety
• Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD)
• Panic disorder 
• Phobias
• Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
• Situational anxiety 

Use only reputable sources for your research, such as peer-reviewed journals, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), the National Alliance on Mental Illness, or the Anxiety and Depression Association of America. You can also find books at your local library on specific topics related to anxiety.

Listen without judgment

When your partner expresses fears or anxieties, it’s tempting to offer a quick fix. Instead, practice active listening and acknowledge their emotions and experiences.

Phrases like “It’s no big deal” or “It’s just in your head” can belittle their experience and make them feel worse. Instead, try phrases like “I understand this is hard for you” or “I’m here for you no matter what” — both of which can provide comfort. 

Offer practical support

Anxiety can make even the smallest daily tasks feel overwhelming, so stepping in to assist with these tasks can relieve some of the burden. This might include helping with household chores or simply being present during anxiety-provoking situations.

Always ask your partner what kind of help they need instead of assuming. 

Encourage healthy coping mechanisms

While medication can be part of your partner’s anxiety treatment plan, it’s not the only piece of the puzzle. There are many healthy coping mechanisms for anxiety, including exercise, practicing mindfulness, and taking care of their sleep and nutritional needs. 

Join them for a walk, listen to a meditation together, or make a healthy meal together.

Respect their boundaries

Anxiety can lead to feelings of being overwhelmed, and sometimes your partner may need space to process their emotions. It’s important to respect their boundaries and understand they might not always be ready to talk or engage in certain activities.

Give your partner space, but let them know you'll be there when or if they need to talk.

Consider therapy together

Couples therapy can help by providing you and your partner a safe space to improve communication, address misconceptions or miscommunications that may be caused by anxiety, and strengthen the relationship through guided support. 

If your partner is hesitant about in-person therapy or has a busy schedule, consider exploring telehealth options together. Teletherapy allows your partner to connect with a mental health professional here at Brooklyn Integrative Psychological Services from the comfort of your home, which can be particularly beneficial for those with anxiety.

Telehealth is available for New York, Oregon, and Massachusetts residents.

Take care of yourself

Most importantly, take care of yourself! You can’t pour from an empty cup, so be sure to prioritize your own self-care. Exercise, sleep, good nutrition, and even support groups for caretakers can go a long way! 

Know the signs that it’s time for help

If your partner’s anxiety is significantly impacting their daily life, gently encourage them to seek professional help. Remember, asking for help is always a sign of strength — never weakness! 

Couples therapy, individual therapy, lifestyle changes, and medication are effective treatments for anxiety, and a Brooklyn Integrative Psychological Services professional can provide tailored strategies to help your partner cope. Professional mental health care can also take into account comorbidities (disorders that occur simultaneously) such as depression. 

To learn more about how our team can help you and your partner, click here to book your appointment for telehealth in Massachusetts, Oregon, or New York State. You can also call the location of your choice — Greenpoint, Union Square, or Midtown —  to get started with in-person therapy.